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Le temps de l’amour – Time for loving

19/01/2021 in Your time
In the autumn of 1962, Françoise Hardy sang "C’est le temps de l’amour Le temps des copains Et de l'aventure Quand le temps va et vient On ne pense à rien Malgré ses blessures Car le temps de l'amour C'est long et c'est court Ça dure toujours On s'en souvient…"(It’s the time for loving The time for friends And for adventure With passing time You forget it all In spite of the pain Because the time for loving Is both long and short It lasts forever, You remember it …) to music by Jacques Dutronc, with whom she wasn’t yet romantically involved. The song featured on the album Tous les garçons et les filles which shot this young French woman, who was quickly described as a new "idol" by the press, to fame. Two years later, she signed a third album, Mon amie la rose, which also referred to the passing of time. And the way that feelings can ebb and flow as the days go by.  
 
 
 
Mademoiselle Hardy’s repertoire touched on the torments of the heart. The question of time and duration come up time and again, like a chorus across her songs, interwoven with love stories. And as each person’s perception is totally different from the other’s, Chronos plays a more prominent role in each couple than one might imagine.
Some people have a tendency to live in the past by nature, whereas others live more in the future. Some people like to organise everything in advance. Or, inversely, improvise everything at the last minute. Some set their watches five minutes fast so that they are never late, whereas others are stylishly late.  
 
All of this stems from personality, from character and sensitivity and even from education, all of which are different for any two beings who are romantically involved. And then, of course, there is a whole host of other factors which lead to a very differing perception of time and duration within a couple, no matter how close they are. For example, a man or a woman who is entranced by a show will not be as aware of the time as their other half yawning their head off on the next seat. For each and every one of us, seconds do not tick on by in the same way when we are experiencing joy, fear, hope or anxiety… And that’s without even considering how it feels during those moments when your heart is racing with emotion. Moments when one is often attracted to someone whose rhythm is different to our own.  
 
 
Psychologists recommend that we don’t set our clocks to match that of our other half. It is instead preferable to learn to manage shared time around the different cadences and schedules. To arrange for neutral time slots, a kind of parenthesis for sharing time together without the pressure of the clock ticking. And to always remember that two people rarely need exactly the same amount of time to make the same decision … Except when it’s a question of love at first sight!
 
Text: Frédéric Martin-Bernard  
Photos: Jean-Marie Périer - L'oeil de la Photographie, AGENCE / BESTIMAGE
 
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